Monday, September 18, 2006

Panasonic's kick-ass computerized mattress

Dear Santa, This year, for Christmas, I would like a Panasonic Programmable Pleasant Sleep Mattress. I have an acute lumbar curve and an extra vertebrae, so my spine is always giving me trouble. I think this mattress will solve all my problems, and that is why you have to put it under my tree, pretty please. If you bring me this mattress for Christmas, I will press the button labeled "good night" every night before bed, and the 8 internal airbags will take my body on a 10-minute blissful stretching journey--inflating one after another to gently stretch out my neck, my shoulders, my hips, my thighs, my calves... and when I wake up, I'll just lie there while the mattress gently shakes my body awake and smoothes out the kinks I developed overnight. My feet will never get cold because of the foot warmer function, and my lower back won't hurt anymore thanks to the lumbar support feature. Plus, if someone stays over, I can change the firmness of the bed by adjusting the air bags, and everyone's happy. It's only 262,500 yen. I'm sure you make that easy with royalties from the Rudolph franchise alone. Oh, and I know it's only September, but this goes on sale October 1oth and I want to make sure I'm the first person in the whole world to have it. Please. I've been a real good girl, I promise. Lisa